It’s been 8 years. I think it’s about time. That. Is. All.

✗♥

in very short incomplete sentences.

Went to Chicago. Extremely jet lagged. DR took Jordan to Dave & Busters. I slept. Woke up and took Jordan to a close cousin’s house in Great Lakes. Went out for sushi. Went for a walk on the Naval Pier. Did a lot of little shopping. Went back to DR’s house. Beat that ass in Halo 3 (I’m a beast). dot dot dot. Woke up to breakfast in bed. French toast. Turkey Sausage. Turkey bacon. Scrambled eggs. Grits. Showered. Went to get my mini me. It was her birthday. Took her shopping. Let her open the few presents I brought from TX. DR bought her a bike. Took her out to eat. Took her to ride her bike on an amazing bike trail. Took her to see Despicable Me (great movie). Let her take a nap while DR and I ‘politic’d’. Did a lot of smiling while packing. Went to airport. Landed in the D. Back to the grind. :)

I have had nothing but a smile on my face now for the past week or so. No particular reason. No particular someone. I am just smiling. From ear to ear. There is absolutely no reason for anyone or anything to keep me from smiling. There are just some things in my life, that I have absolutely NO control over, eg: love, and/or men, and I’m perfectly fine with that. I like this jamz. better. She’ll be around from now on. Railroad tracks and all. *wink*

:)

smile

For the life of me, I can’t understand why it has and is so hard to get over someone. Especially when that person doesn’t feel the way you do. I know I posted a year or so ago, the best way to get over someone is to focus your energy elsewhere. eg: a new person, stopping all communication, etc., but from experience, I’ve learned that it isn’t always that simple. I’ve deleted one guys number, we haven’t followed each other on twitter in AGES, the other we rarely speak on or offline, but my mind is still determined to let them cross it. That’s why I can’t fathom this situation. I don’t even care anymore, that’s the bad part, maybe if I did care about them like I used to, it would make more sense, but since I don’t it’s becoming more and more baffling. One guy does feel the way I feel/felt (past tense?), but scheduling conflicts and distance prohibit [us] from putting our all into it. As many men want to be a starter for me, I have no idea why I don’t bench the starters who aren’t making plays, and put the guys in who want to win. Sports metaphors FTW. I’m still in the dark, but as I stated a few weeks ago, putting yourself out there, is just not something I will do anymore. Ah well, more random thoughts that will hopefully help me find a solution….soon.

I was wondering maybe…

Even though our time together seems to be getting fewer and fewer, I always enjoy your company and last night was no exception. Seeing you was great, but the couples (complete strangers) sitting with us at Benihanas, made it all the more awesome. What happened after is and should stay between us, but as always, you NEVER disappoint. I know you are doing you as am I, but I was wondering…if maybe we could…date again? It seems like we were able to move past the things that caused our demise and somehow still remain friends. I’m not asking for your hand in marriage (like the guys suggested last night), just a chance to date and spend more time with you. I sorta, kinda miss you. No overcooked noodles. So, uh, what do you say? ☺

update: 7/4/10

Since, I know the guy I was speaking about has tumblr and checks my blog out on the regular, I’ll take that as a no. el oh el.